November 7, 2009

"Love is something I've never known."

Words are flying across the circle
They are thrown out in joy
Then fall neatly into the hearer's heart
Fueling a rapid response
And I feel that they're all passing above me
Around me
Not through me

And so to say anything would be
Like stumbling into a game of frisbee,
Uncertain, confused
Not knowing the rules, and being taught
But forgetting. But fumbling.
Like running around, holding the frisbee
Unwilling to let it go

I'm so certain, and I believe
That Your love is strong
But I'm still shivering with cold,
Wearing around my neck a sign
That reads, scribbled in marker,
I need love.
I wonder who else can see it

But I don't know if I trust anyone to take it off-
I feel like I push them away
By my pretense, my smiles
I hold back my tears
Because I'm afraid to be seen
Or I devour their attempts to love
And proclaim myself still starving.

"Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love." -Psalm 90:14


Hayley said...

I can't love you enough. But maybe God through me can.

Eunice said...

A poetic (literally) way to speak of the hole in the middle of our our hearts that only Christ's love can fill. How many of us are so bold as to admit our loneliness? I love you.

the caitlin-bird said...


not knowing how to love, not knowing how to receive love, not knowing. it's painful.